I thought it would be nice to start this creative journey with an intention... and the story behind it. For years and years, I've had a piece of music that came to me 'out of nowhere'. At the time, I played mostly guitar (though piano was and is my first love) but this piece of music insisted on landing on the piano. I don't remember writing or composing it, it literally just 'arrived' and was there. Now that I think of it, how strange that was!
I remember sitting at the piano and trying to put a name on it. As I sat there playing it to get a sense, I felt there was a sadness about it, a longing or yearning of some kind and I was torn between calling it 'missing', or 'lost'.
I remember it evoking in me the notion of dancing, I had a very romantic and ethereal vision of a female, gliding around in some mystic space along to this music. It was dreamlike and there was something haunting about it. It's hard to find the words to describe it, it was an experience, a sense that seemed to land into my life that day and one I could make no sense of or really relate to in terms of myself; still, it stayed with me like a private, spiritual companion. It didn't impose, or ask for anything, it didn't demand words be put to it.. it just arrived and stayed gently with me, there was something comforting about it.
Over the years I've played that piece of music, just played it to myself, that's all. About 3 years ago, the accompanying vision of the female dancing evolved, or transformed, into a vision of a little bird, falling up and down the keys of the piano along with the melody. I started to feel something for this creature, I felt it was struggling, having leaped out of it's nest and taken a tumble. It seemed to have, in it's innocence, emerged singing it's sweet song and then suddenly got swept away by something unexpected, a storm of some kind and got dragged right down into the lower range and minor chords of the piece. It was so surreal!
That vision was so startling, it made me pay attention and listen to this piece in a different way. As I followed the music, I realised there was something dramatic going on with this little life tumbling down the piano. I was witnessing a struggle, undertones of sadness and confusion, anger and defiance.
At the same time, musically it was a rich part of this harmonic journey. Had it not have been there, the piece would have had no dynamic, no punch as such.
I realised there was much more being expressed here. As it continues, I'm happy to say, this little bird comes back... she makes her way out of the drama, the darkness, the anger, she flips the minor and finds her way back, bringing a little of that experience with her, just enough to keep it interesting. She brings it back to her own place and by the time she gets there, she sounds stronger, wiser, weathered.
It's such a good feeling now to play this song, it's heroic, I'm so proud of her when I play. I no longer hold a title for this piece, it just is what it is.
Now I'm not going to say this little bird represents 'me', it's more like a part of me, but it's a part of everyone, it's life... it's not bound to me. It's not bound to time either, it's not past, present or future it's just always, unfolding.. it's a reminder, a call, that no matter what happens, it's a journey to be weathered.
I've written a few songs that have written themselves, I've deliberately 'tried' to write songs (which never worked for me), but never before or since has a piece of music come and not needed words, to be like the rest. So I have both no idea and every understanding of what this song means to me... but it has been noticed, it has been heard.
It is a message that I want to honour in my life, find ways to celebrate my little bird's call, her journey, because she certainly didn't get tossed up for nothing! :)
I recently started painting... to my hearts content and here I'm sharing the first, I hope of many, to represent that 'something', that part of me who wants to be... Also, I wrote a poem.. to give something back to the little bird who gave me my song... Together they express my intention to create, to cultivate and to celebrate the happiness I feel in my heart.
I have a song
It’s from my soul, I’m sure
She plays on my piano
Just music, no words
She's been calling a while
To find her own voice
Wanting to smile
Longing for choice
Her melody is love, expression and light
She is hopeful, creative, playful and bright
She's bursting with passion, ready to try
She seeks winds in her favour and wings to fly
She was alone in there, unheard so long
She's brave, persistent, impatient, strong
Now she's done waiting,
I feel her so near
She's coming to tumble her way out to here
I’m curious to know what she wants to say
So I'm listening now
Getting out of her way